attn upstate - Politics and War Forum

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attn upstate
Friday, July 15, 2005 7:16 AM on j-body.org
i have a question for you if you dont mind.

please note i mean no disrespect towards you or your family by asking this but just want to compare it to some muslim families i know here in jersey.


i used to work with a young egyptian muslim girl. for the most part she cared very little for her faith. however her family (father, mother twow older brothers 1 younger brother) were fairly faithful. she wanted to be more americanized.

however i was eating lunch with her trying to find out about her traditions and culture and she informed me that her father had shown her a special knife, and upon showing her this knife told her that if she ever married a non-muslim he would kill her. she explained to me that her religion gave him the right to do this.

what is your view, and what would be your father's view of this?

Re: attn upstate
Friday, July 15, 2005 7:20 AM on j-body.org
one other question of this type....my father was on a flight back from romania and was seated next to a muslim from one of the balkian countries ( i believehe said albania but i could be wrong), now keep in mind this was back in the early to mid 90's but my father was speaking with the man (about mid 40's in age) and learned that he had a son about 20 years old. my father asked what reaction would he have if his son came and told him he had converted to christianity. with out any emotional change, just stated matter of factly he stated he would kill his son.

what is your view of this and what do you think your father's view would be.
Re: attn upstate
Friday, July 15, 2005 8:32 AM on j-body.org
Hey man, glad to answer some question, no offense taken...


My grandma who recently passed away was VERY religious. My brother and I always messed with her jokingly by saying that we will get married to a christian or a "serb" girl.

My parents are not very religious, they believe in Allah and theres no pork in our household but they do not frequently go to the mosque.

To put some things in perspective, here's a current situation:


I am dating a girl who's father is a christian orthodox. She and her parents have lived in Bosnia for their whole life though. Her mother is muslim. When I told my parents that she is half orthodox my mom was upset, but she always gets upset over things like this at first, she was upset at first when I dated and American girl for 2 1/2 years, she got over it.

My parents would not KILL me if i married a non muslim woman. That is obsurd. However, they would dissapprove if I raised my children by a non muslim way. (giving them a christian name, having them go to a church). I would never do that anyway out of respect for my religion and my family's history. My current girlfriend who is not religious at all says that she would approve of having our "future kids" raised 100% muslim. If it was any other way I would not approve of that.


A lot of this has to do with being proud of who you are. Take the Egyptian girl wants to be more Americanized; I find that funny, I will never strive to be more Americanized, I want to keep true to my roots , cultural and religious, and I want to pass them on to my children I will strive for a a lot of the values that a American citizen has, however I will do all of that while wearing my Bosnian shoes. .


Let me know if you have any more questions...




Re: attn upstate
Friday, July 15, 2005 9:35 AM on j-body.org
do you have any sisters?

are they hot?..just kidding!!!

but if you do are your parents more strict about who they date?

it's been my experience that Muslim boys are encouraged(well maybe not encouraged, but not shunned) to date and marry non muslims where as muslim girls are forbidden under any circumstances to deal intamentaly(non sexually) with non muslim males
Re: attn upstate
Friday, July 15, 2005 9:42 AM on j-body.org
No I don't have any sisters.

My parents would deal with them just like they deal with me, however they would be a little more protective. It's a double standard that exist in most cultures.

There are always freaks who will "kill" their daughter for dating someone they don't like. A lot of white American families will disown their daughter for dating a black man. It's messed up but it exists in a lot of cultures in many different ways. It can be religion, skin color, income, etc.......

My best friends sister married a non muslim dude who's not very religious either. Her family didn't mind because he is a very nice guy with a stable life and career. They both moved to NYC and live and work there now.




Re: attn upstate
Friday, July 15, 2005 12:44 PM on j-body.org



Quote:

A lot of this has to do with being proud of who you are. Take the Egyptian girl wants to be more Americanized; I find that funny, I will never strive to be more Americanized, I want to keep true to my roots , cultural and religious, and I want to pass them on to my children I will strive for a a lot of the values that a American citizen has, however I will do all of that while wearing my Bosnian shoes. .


By being true to your roots it makes you more american because thats what america is about, a diversity of cultures.


____________________________________________________________________
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Re: attn upstate
Friday, July 15, 2005 1:03 PM on j-body.org
/\ You could say that I guess...

I'm talking about some immigrants that WORK on forgetting their past and acting American. I am who I am, nothing can change that. Even when I get my citizenship I will not consider myself a true American, of course my passport will say otherwise, but in my opinion thats is just a piece of paper.

No offense to those who consider that a patriotic thing.




Re: attn upstate
Friday, July 15, 2005 5:30 PM on j-body.org
Upstate: your passport will have your country of birth on it.





Transeat In Exemplum: Let this stand as the example.


Re: attn upstate
Friday, July 15, 2005 7:05 PM on j-body.org
thats OK with me.


It's a piece of paper that enables easier travel for me.




Re: attn upstate
Saturday, July 16, 2005 8:28 AM on j-body.org
just wondering...why do you want your american citizenship? i just wonder since you have a greater respect for your homeland, and obviously probably dont agree with the christian ideals put forth by our current president, and seek to reject being "americanized" when in fact whats american to me could be totally different for someone else. i guess i just dont understand why a lot of immigrants hate the american culture and the christian influence on it, yet come here in flocks and want to become citizens. is it just cuz of the money that can be made here or you have family here? or do you wish to return back to your homeland later on?




Re: attn upstate
Saturday, July 16, 2005 8:29 AM on j-body.org
yea...

I find it interesting though, I have a few fairly muslim, one muslim non-committal and a very muslim friend, and I find that except for the one that is very committed to his religion, the rest are pretty much just like everyone else...

My friend Omar is strictly muslim is actually a bit of a conundrum, because he goes to a kosher grocery in town, and has no problems with the jewish people that run the place. If he comes here for dinner, I try to follow a muslim kosher meal (no ground nuts, no pork definitely), and if something isn't quite cool with him, he still eats it anyhow because he doesn't want to offend (ant yes, he told me this too).

After I read the first few posts, I asked him about the topic and he said that killing your children because they do what they do is stupid. Ideally, he'd like to see his kids grow up and marry people of their faith, and if they chose to convert to another religion, he'd be upset, but what could he really do?? You can't just up and kill people that are of different faith or no faith just for that reason.

This probably stems from the fact that he was born here, raised here, his parents emigrated from Lebanon when they were pretty young (in their teens) as well. He doesn't speak english or french with any accent, and apparently his arabic is flawless, the benefits of growing up in Montreal I suppose.

Either way, I cannot honestly see someone that truly loves their children and has proper mental hygene committing murder because they disapprove of their child's choices.

I say that, but in rare instances, Hindus will kill a bride if the dowry her parents are offering is not satisfactory to the parents of the groom... I guess Karma's a bitch...



Transeat In Exemplum: Let this stand as the example.



Re: attn upstate
Saturday, July 16, 2005 9:29 AM on j-body.org
Quote:

just wondering...why do you want your american citizenship? i just wonder since you have a greater respect for your homeland, and obviously probably dont agree with the christian ideals put forth by our current president,


Like I said, to me the American Passport only enables me easier travel. I don't care if I give up my Bosnian citizenship. I disagree with the Bosnian government's decision's as much as I disagree with the American government's decisions.

Another thing, if I decide to get my American Passport, I can easily move to many countries in the world, and since I want to return to Germany in a few years this will make it much easier.


Quote:

i guess i just dont understand why a lot of immigrants hate the american culture and the christian influence on it


I don't think that the christian influences are messing up the American society. I think that other things like Capitalism and the culture's interpretation of it are messing with it way more. Here, like in no other country I have been to, people are concerned about money. It seems to me that a person here would screw over their mother or brother just to make a buck. I also hate the American pop culture and many people's radical ignorance.

On the other hand there are things that I can get here that i could not get anywhere else. Good education, I learned the language when I moved here, etc.....


Quote:

yet come here in flocks and want to become citizens. is it just cuz of the money that can be made here or you have family here? or do you wish to return back to your homeland later on?



I came here because the situation in my country was terrible. Economically things are still screwed up. A person can graduate from any university in my country and not be able to get a good job. That is why you have all these business, law, economics, pschology and philosophy graduates working on a local construction site making $7 a DAY!

I don't want to return perpamently unless I get a good paying job or the economic situation cleans up.




Re: attn upstate
Saturday, July 16, 2005 11:31 AM on j-body.org
Hopefully that day will be soon.



Transeat In Exemplum: Let this stand as the example.


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